Hanblecheya

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1/28/2017 2:58 pm  #21


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

Deb your idea of giving a journal may help them


The spoken word always comes back as whispers in the wind.
 

1/28/2017 3:15 pm  #22


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

NATIVE_SPIRIT - When people are in grief they don't think of those things.
From my personal experience - I  needed answers. I bought books; I'd lost people before in the family, Mom in 1980, Dad in 91, grandparent (only 1) was around when I was alive. A neighbor who died looking for her cat and she came to our house but we were out in the back, she died on the next door neighbor's. My parents never allowed me to go to a funeral. Death was not really part of my life until I was 16 with the neighbor. I was not around when My mom died. Dad was with her. My dad had a stroke 2 years after mom died and he lived 9 years and I took care of him. But I was working Graveyard one night and I had to get a friend to watch him. Not sure what happened when she was there other than her playing the organ and he died that night. I was working. My son died two blocks down the street so I was not there with him. The only one I saw died in front of me was my husband. He had Cancer and the well known hospital everyone praises about  had a Dr. who was his Dr., he didn't want me calling him (Dr.) I was interrupting him. He was going to give my husband's case to a Vascular Dr., that night they did surgery on his leg, next day they sent a physical therapist into his room to do exercises on his legs. A different Dr. told me he wasn't going to die from Cancer but would die from a blood clot to his lung. The Physical Therapist pushed the blood clot to his lung and I saw it, 30 min later it hit his lungs and he died.

I've not had that much personal experience with death - however I know my husband was around after they pronounced him dead because when his dad came into room on a wheel chair and sat by his bed; my father in-law said he felt Tom's hand grab his wrist. 

I just know I needed answers when my son died. I wanted to know who was going to feed him, clothe him, cut his hair...etc. So I read spiritual books. But what helped me the very most was being OPEN to anything and all things relating to his passing. I could see images in my Peripheral Vision. I heard him speak to me within my head. He would move things and sent messages to us before my his dad died. 

When we have grief we can put of a steel wall around us that blocks that communication from a loved one who had died. I didn't have that experience. I heard from them both right away. However I did have Millicent a friend on a forum who asked me to help her with her and the passing of her spouse. She had that wall up and it took over a year before she could see or hear Tony. 

I went through the stages of Grief extremely fast. Everyone is different and experience things differently. 

I think Anything helps. Thanks Native_Spirit




 


People do not remember words as much as they remember experiences. 
 
     Thread Starter
 

1/28/2017 3:17 pm  #23


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

If you can link to this here is the article I read about dying. 
I enjoyed reading it. 

http://www.angelicreiki.net/index.php/about-angelic-reiki/death-and-dying


People do not remember words as much as they remember experiences. 
 
     Thread Starter
 

1/28/2017 3:27 pm  #24


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

Deb you raised an important point there.everyone does grieve differently and there are many stages of grief also.some are more excepting of grief others brush it under the carpet and get on with it.only for something small and not important happen.and that can trigger the grieving process.


The spoken word always comes back as whispers in the wind.
 

1/28/2017 4:09 pm  #25


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

I lost my partner Pete last july 15th.. Its been 6 months now and every now and then I still feel he's about..  I sat in his arm chair today amd watched a movie, I could almost hear him say 'A cup of tea would be nice!' I actually went and made one, but just the one.. 
  When he passed, I missed it as I went home that night after 9 days of camping out in the hospice.. It was like he was waiting for me to go home, so he could do the same..  Afterwards,   I kept on finding little things he had hidden about my living room, cards, little notes, all kimds of things, even a sugar heart..
It helped me because I could still feel him around me.

But his daughter didn't cope at all, she hit the bottle big time as she felt so guilty. She had shunned him for years because he and her mum got divorced.. It happens, get over it..       She took her mothers side and cut him off for years.. He wasn't allowed to see his grandsons.. Now she is feeling bad because of how she reacted.. I have not seen her for months, I did contact her last week and over christmas too, she has only just replied so I might see her in a few days time.. People deal with life events the way that works for them..

I have a lot of good memories, she does not,  as she only began spending time with him 9 weeks before he died..

Last edited by Star Wolf Medicine Woman (1/28/2017 4:15 pm)


There is a good way,  a bad way, and a better way.  For my path, I choose the better way..
Nicholas Black Elk
 
 

1/28/2017 8:16 pm  #26


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

Native spirit wrote:

Deb you raised an important point there.everyone does grieve differently and there are many stages of grief also.some are more excepting of grief others brush it under the carpet and get on with it.only for something small and not important happen.and that can trigger the grieving process.

I've seen the different grieving processes in a lot of friends. 
There is one online on my facebook pages that always posts beautiful photos of her son with wings, at the grave with a 8 foot cross with his name on it. 90% of her posts are about her son. Others let the paid eat away at them. Some do brush it under the carpet; see that too but they get sick with disease too. Everyone knows they will lost their parents; but it's harder to accept the face that you outlive your child.

Myself; having not dealt with death much growing up. I did not want it to consume me so that's why I researched.
And the process to which it all unfolded was no accident. Things are planned in life and much is without our control. I found myself much more at peace with it all when I found the the spiritual road. I don't like to call it spirituality any more because religions use it too. The word enlightened works better for me. When I knew they were both safe and sound I accepted what had occurred. Especially hearing their voices after they had passed made it even more reassuring. I just had to adjust at being without. I am glad I still had a daughter. 

I think the reason I lost it at work when Stacey died was because it was unable to say goodbye. 
The co-worker that came into my office to tell me shocked me. No goodbyes.
Just like the woman who banged on my window in the middle of the night to tell me my son was in a terrible accident. No goodbyes. 

When I was in the hospital Oct 1979 delivering my daughter; just after doing so I called and Dad answered. 
I told  him what I had and could I talk to Mom; he said "She can't come to the phone; she had a massive stroke during your delivery". Again no goodbyes. 

Life sucks for a moment and you move on. 
I've seen them all in dreams so I know they are fine. 







 
 


People do not remember words as much as they remember experiences. 
 
     Thread Starter
 

1/29/2017 8:59 am  #27


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

I can tell you what someone told me after my dad passed. I was sent home the night he died they wouldn't let us stay, then phoned my poor mother in the early hours to say he had died.. We were upset and angry at not  being given the opportunity to say our goodbys..

My friend Jay  who is a internationally known Mediu, told me this... and this actually works.    Take an old mobile phone and use it to call your loved one.. no need to dial a number, just  tell them what you had wanted to say in the way of a goodbye.. It is way of unburdening yourself and allowing you to let go.. A chance to say all the things you wanted to say, a chance to say Goodbye..

Last edited by Star Wolf Medicine Woman (1/29/2017 9:02 am)


There is a good way,  a bad way, and a better way.  For my path, I choose the better way..
Nicholas Black Elk
 
 

1/29/2017 11:28 am  #28


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

Yes, Star Wolf, that phone tool is a nice idea. 
Sorry you had to experience being sent home and not being able to say goodbyes. 

 


People do not remember words as much as they remember experiences. 
 
     Thread Starter
 

1/29/2017 1:00 pm  #29


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

Yes it was a thoughtless thing to do to us all. My son and hiswife drove 50 odd miles to see him and weretold to go along with us, almost as soon as they arrived..    There was no communication between the day nurses and the night shift, which is really bad.. When it came to my mothers death, no one there was askng me to go home... I was too well known in that hospital... I worked there 28 years...

In the end the last night it was just my mother and  myself... I cannot write on the open forum what occured...what I witnessed and physically saw the moment she died......  I did speak to a Medium friend about a week later and related what happened to her... she told me she had a similar experience when her mother died..


There is a good way,  a bad way, and a better way.  For my path, I choose the better way..
Nicholas Black Elk
 
 

1/29/2017 2:12 pm  #30


Re: I have a special healing request for a co-worker of mine.

A friend that I had known since I was young lived next door to me when I moved back here from living away.i knew her mother and father one of the sons was good friends with my husband,he was here every night without fail.his grandmother became ill.jamie the son was very close to her.she had to go into a nursing home.three times they thought she was on her way out.Jamie phoned me and said the home said she had only just passed I said they are lying to you go check.jamie his mother and sister went down and were told that she has two carers around her when she passed,again I said they are lying so sue the mother asked me what happened I wasn't there and I said to sue your dad came to collect her and no carers were with her,they knew time was short and should have informed the family so they could be there but they didn't,I said to sue threaten them with legal action until they tell you the truth.thats when they admitted instead of phoning the family to go down there they went outside for a cigarette instead.by the time 20 minutes passed they went back in she had passed. sue nearly had a breakdown because she always told her mother she would be with her at the end.and they took that away from her so none of them could say goodbye it took months of me talking to her taking her through it so she could come to terms with it.


The spoken word always comes back as whispers in the wind.
 

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